Too Big a World. Too Many Lives to Live.

I felt like I've lived here some past life ago. 

It's just too vibrant, too frisky, too seductive.

If San Francisco were a man, I would've proposed to him right then and there. 

 View of SFO from the Coit Tower

 The Golden Gate Bridge

 Alcatraz

Ayie at a corner street in Mission District

"And I Also Don't Know How to Cook": LA-Vegas Travel Diary

My days are like Rihanna's style- sometimes too much, sometimes too little, other days on point, always on freestyle.

The thing they say about training the brain the way you exercise any other muscle in your body is for real. I've been trying to draft some sort of routine in this otherwise Bad Girl Riri schedule. So far I've succeeded tricking this squishy part in my skull to start reading every day, do Pilates, drink diluted apple cider vinegar, and wake up each morning grateful for the dreams that night, for the day that was, and the day ahead.

Now 'writing' on the other hand is my prodigal son. And I've decided to go fetch him rather than wait around the whole day and rejoice for his monumental comeback.

After a hissy fit and a lot of searching, here we are finally with another blog post. Hopefully the next one won't be as much of a riot to bring home.  

The Broad Museum

Eji at the Griffith Observatory

 

Sta. Monica

 

Adventure Diary: Australia

Surreal.

Visiting a new country, let alone a new continent, feels like unlocking something. Not in the sense that it's an achievement but more of weirdly proving that such place actually exists for real. I mean I've only seen it in photos, movies, heard stories, and know of people who've been there. But in my mind, it's almost like Narnia or Hogwarts- fictional, until I've actually been given the chance to set foot in it.

That's how visiting Australia was like for me. 

Korea Photo Diary

I've been trying to organize photos in my archive as a way to categorize and maybe even dust off bits and pieces of memories as I always do when I take some time off from the daily grind- because I'm sentimental that way. K.


This is a major throwback from our prod'n company's trip to South Korea: reminiscing Koreanovela-esque walks around chilly Myeongdong, the incredible street food selection (ohmygod the cheesy baked clams and giant strawberries!!!), getting googley-eyed at the Museum of Modern and Contemporary Art in Seoul (note to self: always allot at least 2 days when visiting a museum), the streets of Itaewon lined with gay bars and happy drunks (good times, indeed), all-out dancing- partially due to the magical combination of Soju and Aloe Vera juice, and part celebration of finally a non-working vacation.

Royal Guard-Changing Ceremony, Gyeongbokgung PalaceGyeongbokgung PalaceStreet Performers, HongdaeGyeongbokgung PalaceGyeongbokgung PalaceGyeongbokgung Palace

All is Swell

"You have to find that place that brings out the human in you, the soul in you, the love in you." R.M. Drake

Why We Do What We Do

After our show, Ride N' Seek, aired, I had the chance to take the time off and stay away from as much work as I could. We worked hard for the better part of the year so it was nice to have had a bit of a breather.

Although it's true that there's no substitute for hard hustle, the past few weeks served as a reminder of a life much greater than work.

On the Road

"Our battered suitcases were piled on the sidewalk again; we had longer ways to go. But no matter, the road is life.” -Jack Kerouac

A beautiful little girl inside a Manobo Hut, Butuan City 

A kid who went up a tree and came down with a bird, Leyte

The Beginning is the End is the Beginning

Having filmed the final episode last month, it felt like another heartbreak. We have to deal with yet another ending. Sifting through old photos from the past seasons, I just thought to myself- This. We did all this.

Quiet Spaces

Tell Me a Story of Your Youth: Batanes Photo Diary

Tell me a story of your youth.

I'd like to know your wildest dreams. How was your first encounter with rain, sunburn, sand, and ocean? Tell me about the time when worry was not yet in your vocabulary. What was your nickname back then?  Do you remember your deepest wounds? Mine was on my left knee. I still admire the scars until now. 

The Mystery of the Shrunken Clothes

When I was young, I had a favorite top that I liked wearing. One day, my mom said that it was already small and it doesn't fit me anymore. In my 4 year-old mind, I honestly thought that clothes shrink and shrink until they disappear. I wanted to know where clothes went when they're no longer visible to the naked eye. Could they be in the same place where all the lost things are- the items never to be found again?

I turned a year older a few weeks ago. I am now 25.

I suddenly remembered my weird childhood theories and the mystery of the shrunken clothes. Of course I now know that clothes don't get smaller, instead we grow bigger.

But my now 25-year old mind still has a lot of questions. I wonder, what about memories? Where do memories go- those never to be remembered again? 

Through the years, I've learned to really put value in moments. Moments that eventually turn into compiled short stories that define us. 

So for fear of forgetting, I'm stitching together 25 photos from my 2015 into new narratives that somehow make more sense to me. They've come to evolve into these humble crumbs of "wisdom", that I've picked up along the way.

"To Bigger and Bigger Things..."

Don't you just love the feeling of take off? 

Every time I'd get on a plane, I'd remember my very first plane ride when I was young. I saved up my measly allowance for a trip with my mom and my sister. 

Since we were young, we were trained to take care of our own expenses, as we didn't have much money. I'd like to think that early on, I learned how to be responsible. I also learned that I was meant to move. 

That first plane ride will be one of my most important memories. 

We were on our way to Hong Kong. 

Space-Time Continuum

How can it be

that after all that Time that separated us, 

literally amounting to half of our lives;

and all that vast physical space

- of oceans, borders, and continents- placed between us...

still, the first thing we told each other when we finally met again is "you haven't changed."

Becoming

My dad grew up in San Juan and we've practically lived here since I was in grade school. I often ask my dad what it's like to grow old with the same people and to witness how life has unfolded for them so far. What does it feel like to see how a person becomes?

Having the opportunity to photograph our neighbors has somehow given me a new connection to my dad's past (and present) and a new way of relating to our little community in Pasadena.

Boy Cobra (left) and Joseph (right) are just two among those people. 

Will be posting a photo series soon, together with our group, Weekend Project :) 

Life Aquatic

I haven't written anything in a while. I need time to sit still and stay in one place. I don't have that luxury yet.
In a few minutes, I leave again, but at this moment, I know I have to steady my thoughts. 

Back in the city for a few days and even when I'm in the city, I find myself daydreaming about the sea.

Be Brave With Your Life

I look back to check if the trail I left behind somehow still leads to where I came from. I make sure not to confuse them with someone else's. I then continue moving forward, trying to chase light.

It's a vital practice, I believe, especially for those who've been lost countless times, but have somehow managed to create a home wherever they ended up finding themselves in.

Right now, looking at where I'm standing, with feet firm to the ground, something tells me I've been feeling my way to the right direction all along. "My dear", 
I convince myself, "there is really nothing to be scared of."  
I could no longer count how many times I've told myself, 
"You are strong, Jen". And every time, I believe.
I guess I have no choice but to be. Anyway, this should be fun :)

New Year has this funny, ritualistic nature. I've picked out 23 photos as part of my personal ceremony in tracing the constellation of events that somehow form an image of my 2014.  

Deciding to develop a set of habits and workflow to eliminate "not having enough time" as an excuse for not doing things I've always wanted to do.

Being given the chance to present/showcase our documentary at the Visual Documentary Festival in Kyoto University. 

And finding greater honor in being given the trust and the chance to share a story about the Agta-Dumagat-Remontados indigenous group of General Nakar, Quezon.

That surreal feeling of being in another country and experiencing a whole new landscape and culture. Also, realizing that gloves, scarves, and thermal wear exist for a very good reason. (Kyoto, Japan, March 2014)